Let me share a true story with you...

Bob Franklin Retired at age 68, and he and his wife, Marge, had $2,800 coming in each month to enjoy life--something they felt they had earned after 45 years of hard work.

Just one year later, however, disaster struck. Bob was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, and his mental health declined rapidly. Within a year, the jovial and loving Bob now was grouchy and often mentally abusive to his wife. Once a proud, sprightly woman, Marge now was relegated to serving and pampering a husband who would constantly yell and belittle her. Her self-esteem crumbled. After much soul-searching, she decided to put him in a nursing home. She found a nice facility near her home, and it cost $3,500 a month. But she figured that Medicare would help her with the payments.

However, she found out after admitting him that, in almost all cases, Medicare doesn't pay for nursing home stays. She asked her accountant and attorney about Medi-Cal, and they told her she had too much in assets to qualify for Medi-Cal benefits.

Marge was at her wit's end. She couldn't take her husband's abuse anymore, but the nursing home would wipe her out. Although the couple's names have been changed, this is not a fictional story.

Similar scenes play out every day in California: A senior citizen pays for a nursing home, and goes broke doing so.

Currently, there are 2.5 million Americans in nursing homes. More than half of them have spouses who are footing the bill or who paid for it until all their assets were exhausted. Women whose husbands died in nursing homes are the fastest-growing impoverished segment in the United States today.

However, they don't need to be.

For years, I worked as a financial planner for seniors. I found that the plans I sold did little or nothing to help spouses who were paying for a nursing home. These spouses had been told by Medi-Cal, their doctor, their attorney, their accountant, their friends and other people they trust that they have too much in assets to qualify for Medi-Cal nursing-home benefits. After much research, I found that these people were wrong.

Let me debunk some of the myths:

Myth: I could lose my house if my spouse is admitted into a nursing home.

If the couple owns a home, it is totally exempt from the Medi-Cal equation. The state cannot seize the house, nor can a lien be filed against it.

Myth: Children's assets also will be considered in the Medi-Cal equation.

The only assets that are considered are the couple's. If a parent who is widowed or no longer married enters a nursing home, the children's assets are still exempt.

Myth: Having a living trust protects my assets from Medi-Cal.

Medi-Cal can still file a claim against an estate for the cost of a nursing home. In other words, your children's inheritance can be used to pay back Medi-Cal.

Myth: There is no way to protect life savings against Medi-Cal.

There are many ways, but only a specialist in Medi-Cal benefits will be able to show you how. It's never too late: Even if a spouse or parent is already in a nursing home, their life savings can be saved.

Medi-Cal's laws regarding nursing home benefits are so difficult to understand that most of the state's own case workers don't know all the nuances. The regulations alone are in a binder more than six inches thick.

This is the advice I give to my clients: Don't take "no" for an answer. You have a right to have a professional's care for your spouse or parent, while at the same time not going broke because of it.

The biggest myth, and the most damaging one, is this:

Neither my spouse nor I will ever go into a nursing home.

There are 2.5 million people in America's nursing homes, and none of them thought they would ever be there either.

Why is this the most damaging myth? By fooling yourself into believing that this can't happen to you, you fail to plan for the future. When it comes to Medi-Cal and nursing homes, a little planning can go a long way.

Protect your retirement. Protect your savings. Each year, a half-million families become impoverished from the cost of long-term care. Don't become one of them.

Bob Scrivano is an independent senior care planning consultant. His toll-free number is 1-800-999-8007.